Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Joint Custody For Parents - Is it a Win Win Situation?


Raising children is not the easiest task on earth, but going straight through a divorce, and dealing with joint custody for parents can be very taxing for all concerned. It takes very mature parents to deal with the issues of joint custody, but it can be very worthwhile when done properly.

We have all heard of those cases where children of divorced parents play one parent against the other to get more and more out of each parent, while taking full control over their parents. This is not a good situation for the parents or their children. No matter what, children still need to know their parents are in control, that their parents make the decisions, and what they say goes.

How To Win Custody For Fathers

Too often parents feel guilty about putting their children straight through the stresses of divorce, and try to compensate by being especially nice to their children, treating them lots all the time, and perhaps not disciplining their children enough. As a result, these children may come to be used to getting their own way with both parents, and they then expect this in their lives at school or day care. This can lead to problems in the classroom, or it can even continue in the classroom, as a teacher may be sympathetic with the child over the disunion issues and the extra stresses it puts on the children involved.

So if there is joint custody for the parents, how should it be handled? Firstly, both parents should show their children that they respect their ex, and more than this, they should talk naturally, without stress if at all possible to their ex. This is often easier said than done, but the child should see and hear normal adult conversations, and make note of that word, conversations, not arguments!

Secondly, joint custody means children sharing time with both parents, may be equally, maybe not, but this commonly means making allowances when, for instance, work takes one parent out of town for a few days. Children and schedules are constantly changing, and this happens for years. Children get sick at the most inopportune times! They have projects due just when you have a big presentation due, and so it continues.

Parents have to be able to communicate with their ex partner so that any issues that occur with regard to their children are dealt with in a timely and standard manner, and with both parents agreeing on what to do. Joint custody means sharing the job of parenting, and that can only be prosperous if both parents agree with the methods used by the other to discipline their child or children.

Joint custody for parents is something that has to be worked on determined to get joint custody awarded by the courts. It is not something which can be taken for granted, but once awarded it can be useful for all involved, in case,granted the lines of transportation are open in the middle of everyone.

Joint Custody For Parents - Is it a Win Win Situation?


See Also : How to win Custody (for Men & Women)